Notecards are now available for this year's fundraiser...get the details HERE!

Making connections

So it appears I am slowly morphing into one of those "prairie moms" who have always perplexed me so.  You know, the kind who make their own yogurt and sew sassy reusable shopping bags (right after they turn over the compost pile in the backyard)?  No homemade yogurt yet, but I do find myself spending more time in the kitchen than ever in my adult life.  And the truth is I kind of like it.  When we converted to a mostly plant-based diet, I had no idea that my beloved "convenience foods" would be a thing of the past.  We seldom order pizza anymore.  Now, pizza for dinner means making the dough, the sauce and the toppings.  If we want brownies, they come from a bag of flour, not a box.  After a long day at work, all that chopping, mixing, and slow-cooking was a little overwhelming.  But along with producing better-tasting, healthier dinners, something else started to happen.  The kids turned off the TV and made their way into the kitchen too: "Whatcha doin?"  Ethan likes to sit and peer through the tiny window in the bread machine watching it mix the dough.  NiNi is an expert dumper and stirer of ingredients.  Meagan can now make several components of a dinner all by herself....including corn bread from scratch.  And we are making connections while we cook.  Talking, laughing and playing.  Some of my fondest childhood memories are of sitting on the kitchen counter while my mom taught me to make a pie crust or whip mashed potatoes.   Making pie crust is not a great feat, but my point is that "kitchen" arts have been somewhat lost in my generation.  And in many ways, family connections right along with them.  Don't get me wrong, many days dinner preparation still consists of a hurried, stressed out mom and bickering kids.  But we are learning so much about really "being" with the kids, whether that means making a batch of pancakes or telling stories or having a tickle fest.  Too often our definition of quality time was being present in the same room, watching a movie or having them in the car while I run errands.  Physically together, but not emotionally close.  As NiNi's emotional issues surfaced we have seen how much of it stems from her anxiety and her need to be close to us.  This may all seem like a no-brainer to most of you, but let me tell you it has been a huge paradigm shift for me.  It has meant turning off my computer (including emails, blogging and facebook) until the kids are in bed.  Ignoring the "beep" every time a text comes through on my phone (Honestly, what did we do before people were immediately accessible 24 hours a day through an electronic device which has become an extra body part?)  And actually playing with the kids on their terms.  The other day NiNi and I played with dolls for almost an hour.  Once I forgot about all the things I wanted to get done, I think I had more fun than she did.  I am learning to break up the love affair with my 'to do' list...and to value connecting over doing.  I think I know the effect all of this will have on my hobbies and the cleanliness of my house but I'm pretty sure it's worth it (and let's face it my house was not all that clean to begin with)!

Daddy Daughter Date Night

Chris had a lovely lady on each arm to accompany him to Rick's Boatyard for dinner and the church dance afterward.  Not quite sure where they get their stunning beauty, but aren't we lucky!

NiNi's birthday and catch-up

We celebrated NiNi's 6th birthday at Monkey Joe's.  She has been planning her birthday party almost since her last birthday party, right down to the cake.  Problem is, the plans change from month to month...princess party, Hello Kitty party, horse theme, skating party, etc.  Chris happened to win a Monkey Joe's party at a fundraiser so that seemed to sufficiently fulfill the queen's requirements:)

There is a toddler area at Monkey Joe's.  It captured Ethan's attention for about 3 minutes, or until he realized that there were much much bigger slides to be conquered.  The above picture shows Ethan's size relative to the other kids!  Going down was a breeze, but getting to the top a whole different matter.  A couple of times I saw him walking around hand-in-hand with random little girls, and then realized he was using them to help him get up the ladders.  Smart boy...he knows how to use his looks to get what he wants!

We have started attachment therapy.  The big 2 week intensive sessions are in April but we have started our stack of reading material and the individual parent session.  Here's a fun fact.  One book reported a much lower rating of marriage satisfaction among couples who have children verses couples who have no children.  And marriage satisfaction increase as the children leave the home.  Chris and I had trouble stifling the giggles. I guess we are up a creek then, metaphorically speaking. The therapist has a 2-hour session with each parent to make sure there are no underlying issues that could hinder the attachment process. I could have told him that it's going to take a lot longer than 2 hours to sort through the inner workings of this crazy person! Seriously, we are very excited and hopeful our home will be a much happier place when all of this is over.

I have not updated in awhile about E-man. We are hopefully coming to a reprieve in doctor visits and tests. In the past 3 months we have had 1 surgery (ear tubes) 5 specialist appointments, 4 blood tests, 1 unpleasant allergy test, an MRI (with IV sedation)and 1 eye dilation (after which he nearly fell down the stairs because he couldn't see to walk). I have a whole new sympathy for families whose children have chronic illnesses. Luckily Chris had some PTO to eat up by the end of the year, otherwise I don't know how we could've taken all the time off of work. And (drum roll please...) the reason for his small size??? Well, as it turns out, he may actually be Chinese. Yes, it came as a shock to us as well. That, and he does have some small differences genetically. We are learning that many people can have small deletions or additions to their genetic code and this has absolutely no effect on them. They may never be aware of it, because they don't have a reason to get tested. Let's face it, not everyone is independently wealthy like we are, and can afford a $5,500 blood test to screen for genetic abnormalities. We go at the end of March for the consultation with the geneticist to discuss the results, but I don't expect any earth shattering news. There is no known syndrome associated with his deletion and, functionally, he is doing great. He is growing, albeit slowly, but he is growing. His speech has really taken off after the ear tubes. He is still hard to understand, but the girls and I understand most of what he says. He is speaking in 2-3 word sentences. At breakfast he chants, "Eat my Panda Puffs!" When I yawn, he asks, "You Tired?" He loves to play role reversal when we read books. He points to the picture and wants me to tell him what it is. When I do, he enthusiastically says, "You're right!" He learned how to sing the Happy Birthday song.  He likes to pretend things are candles and brings them to us to "blow out". When we're all sitting around at the table, the girls tell us long, drawn out stories about their days. Now Ethan likes to says, "Mom! Hey Mom!..." and then trails off into his toddler language with all the appropriate inflection and intonation. We listen intently and say uh-huh, uh-huh and then laugh hysterically at the end of the story. So the conclusion of the matter is that he is a smart, happy, active little guy, just a little on the small size. Dashed are our hopes of having another Yao Ming. I guess I can live with that.